I AM PAPA CHP. 3 – THE IMPORTANCE OF MARRIAGE PART 2

A strong marriage is so important in so many ways.  That relationship in a household is like the leadership at a company or in the military.  If the leadership and the morale is bad, the company or the unit will feed off of those leaders and productivity will fail.  It is the leaders who radiate positivity, hope, and who motivate those in their care to accomplish great things.  As a married couple you are the leadership within the home.  You are the CEO, you are the owner and operator, and you are the commander of your family.  They look to you for inspiration and for a positive outlook on life, regardless of what is going on around you.  They are counting on you for support when things in their own lives seem to be falling apart.  How can you expect to carry this much responsibility if your own relationship within your home is a disaster?  Don’t think that the kids don’t notice it or that it doesn’t have an impact on them.  They will notice and it most definitely has an impact and that impact is more far reaching than you know. 

How do I know this?  Well, because I come from a single parent household.  My parents split up when I was a baby.  I never had a “normal” family until my mother re-married.  My step-father was and is a good man but when you’re a kid and another man comes into your house it is very hard to see past the fact that someone is trying to take your fathers place.  Or so you think.  That situation is almost always one that leads to arguments and in-fighting.  Now that I’m older and have a family of my own, we have a great relationship and I appreciate everything that he did for my mother and I.  The biggest issues I struggle with still to this day have nothing to do with him.  They center around the fact that my biological father just wasn’t there when I needed him.  I remember how excited I would get when he was supposed to come pick me up for the weekend.  I would pack and wait for him on the porch and watch for his car to pull up, thinking about all the things we would do together.  Many times, he would be late, hours late, and my mother would have to console me and give him excuses and reasons for not being there.  Those times we spent together were just too few and far apart.  That feeling of disappointment and sadness still stick with me today.  Remember that when you decide how to spend your time, or how you decide to run your marriage.  These decisions have lasting effects and cannot be undone.

Your marriage is your family’s foundation.  You are their rock that they expect to be there to stand on.  They rely on you to be the greatest example in their lives.  That doesn’t mean perfect.  It means you are there for them in times of need, it means you give them your time and energy to help develop them into amazing people.  They know when this is happening and when it’s not and they will remember it forever. 

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